New family news, and news from Team Chenzhou 2012, a team VERY near and dear to my heart.
Because I was a part of Team Chenzhou 2011.
And I was strongly considering being a part of Team '12, until this whole "getting married" thing came up.
We are getting married exactly 55 days before the team flies out to China.
So naturally, I assumed it wouldn't be possible to go.
And since them visions and memories of the time in China have graced my daily thoughts and prayers and nightly dreams.
As time has been racing towards the wedding I have still been thinking and praying for the team.
Then, this past week, Shannon posted in the group we have going from Team '11 asking us to pray for guidance and her team.
They have lost 7 team members within the past month.
That's HALF of her team.
7 less sets of arms to hold babies,
7 less sets of lips to kiss their foreheads and cheeks,
And 7 less people that could have a strong, lasting impact on the nannies and employees of the Chenzhou SWI.
This KILLED me.
Last night, I got maybe 4 hours of sleep, in about 1 hour increments, divided by times of thinking over and praying fervently for the team.
And as the clock hit 4am, I realized that maybe the Lord was trying to get me to realize something.
I had done my FAFSA last evening with my dad.
And I got an email giving me my estimate.
Which ended up being about $4,500 more than Chad and I had budgeted.
The cost of China when all is said and done is...
...you guessed it, about $4,500.
And I began to think. And pray.
More fervently.
And I began to wonder if God was starting to open doors.
And yeah, Chad and I had already decided that it was not in the budget.
But our God is bigger than budgets.
So, I dropped the bomb on Chad today ad I was driving to see him.
Poor hubby-to-be.
Shock, disbelief, and worry laced his voice.
And since he's going into financial planning, the BIG obstacle is money.
And the whole "I'd be leaving my husband of 55 days to spend 2 weeks in a foreign country" thing.
But like to wonderful, patient guy he is, he heard me out, and was eventually "the most okay with it he could be".
And I understand that.
We looked at where and what we could cut to make it work, before, after, and during the trip...
So we started to crunch our numbers around the payment schedule.
Which goes like this:
$200 deposit with application
$2,000 by May 6 (PS, 6 days before the wedding!)
Remaining balance 3 weeks before the trip. (About June 15)
I am sorry to say that after talking and turning and calculating, we can't seem to find a way to make it work.
And that KILLS me.
KILLS me.
We will have the money, but not until August.
It KILLS me that I am able to go financially 2 months after the fact, easily, but I can't when they go.
It causes me much emotional and even physical pain.
So here is where I ask for advice, from those wiser and further in their marriages.
What should we do?
Chalk it up to coincidence and forget about me going?
Run our bank account dry trying to get me there?
Start the process and wait to see if somehow money comes in?
Borrow it from someone? Who?
I (we) asking for advice and prayer here.
What would you do for a girl who has the Hunan and the kids there so deep in her heart?
And a brand new husband willing to send her if he could?
If I meet these kids someday, what do I say to them?
That money was my excuse to not invest in their physical, spiritual, and emotional health?
Help!
Love,
Hunan at Heart <3
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